Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category

Holy Dyvers

Sunday, August 2nd, 2020

After spending three nights getting re-supplied in Greyhawk, we hopped back on our well-worn saddles and made the overnight trip to Dyvers. In case you don’t know, and I really didn’t until I went through its large gates, is that Dyvers is pretty damn rich. They are at a nexus of several trade routes, and there is decent Nyr Dyv access. But I doubt anyone is reading this travel journal for economic policy history.

Know what rich places have in abundance? Rich people. I probably saw a half-score of those human/demi-human/humanoid chariot things, where someone is carried around by six or eight folks that have 15 or greater strength. I don’t even know what one of those things is called, but I know enough to know that it costs more than I make in a typical adventure just to keep one of those going.

Another thing rich places have are places to eat. Want to eat carp from the Azure Sea served to you by a wood elf? You can do it. Want a big hunk of reindeer meat? Well, head down to the Barbarian Bar-B-Q and prepare to eat. Plants more your thing? One of the street markets we walked by had six types of halfling radish.

Another thing rich places are is expensive. Do not go to Dyvers if you have to worry about money. The meals I talked about above all ran well over 5 gps per person, plus merry juice is expensive. Dyvers is orderly, so don’t think you can pull a fast one here. But if you have the money, Dyvers offers a lot for the tasteful adventurer.

  • Why did we go there? It was close, and I hadn’t really explored it.
  • What is there that is interesting? Lots of rich people, lots of restaurants and taverns, expensive stuff.
  • Would we go again? You bet. If price doesn’t matter, there are a lot of good places to rest one’s weary head, get a filling meal, and relax in a safe, orderly, prosperous city.

Up next: Getting gnarly in the Gnarly Forest.

John Saxon: Off to Fight Freddy Somewhere Else

Thursday, July 30th, 2020

Long-time character actor John Saxon died this week. Saxon is best known, at least according to high-brow sources, as one of the participants/willing beat-down participants in Bruce Lee’s Enter the Dragon (1973). Don’t get me wrong: Saxon is pretty rad in Dragon and wears some impressive robes.

However, to yours truly, his best role is as Nancy Thompson’s Sheriff Dad in Nightmare on Elm Street (1983). Granted, he mistakenly arrests Rod, which leads to Rod’s death in jail, and he is understandably a bit skeptical of his daughter’s claims that a dirty-hat wearing spectral child murder is responsible for all the carnage. That said, he comes through in the end, using some of those cop breaking-and-entering skills so he can save his daughter.

Mostly I think he is great in this movie because it was either the first or second horror movie that I saw that really scared me. I am talking about not being able to sleep and assuming that every sound was Freddy coming to give me the ol’ slash and stab type of scared. But, knowing that John Saxon was out there gave me a little hope that I might survive.

John Saxon 1958.jpg

Once again, back from the dead

Thursday, July 9th, 2020

They tried to keep us down. Whomever it was–Planet Spammer, Russian trolls, Waterdeep trolls, John Birch Society members–managed to hijack the contact/email form of your beloved Perverse Osmosis, which, in turn, led the site getting suspended.

But these dastardly dastards were not going to get the final word in. After actually spending time and a fairly modest amount of gold pieces, we are back, ready to spew forth all anyone ever wanted to know about grells, gnolls, the various Gith races, gibbering mouthers, and other monsters that may or may not begin with G.

To the future.

Hail Zeke

Saturday, August 4th, 2018

As everyone who has ever spent a Halloween here at Perverse Osmosis knows, this collective entity loves itself some Zeke. We dedicated a whole October to them a few years back, and they are on moderate listening rotation for your humble narrator. That said, our friends from Seattle hadnít released much since Til the Living End, which, for many of us, is not we had come to worship. I know that bands gets bored of playing the same stuff, and that it is important to grow as a musician, but still. I am out for one thing: 78 RPM mayhem. The band went into semi-retirement and key parts left, leaving me to wonder if we had seen the last of Zeke.

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The Queen’s Harvest of Death

Sunday, May 20th, 2018

Onto B12: Queen’s Harvest, which is another intro-level module that came out well past when I was an intro-level adventurer. That said, a beginning DM could do much worse than using this module to start off the tales of Gimlor, Drylin Maidenkisser, and the rest.

Highlights:

  • There are lots and lots of orcs and goblins running around the keep. Big surprise, none of them are well-led, and all of them can easily be tricked, bribed, or otherwise disposed of. Also, killing them works.
  • Orcs don’t like taking orders from hobgoblins. No kidding–who does?
  • There are a lot of good names in B12: Dyarr-Dakk, Klossarek, Ratgrobb, and Skrakkbak could be the name of a humanoid law firm.
  • Ogre and the Owlbear- not only a potentially lethal encounter to start off the dungeon crawl but also the newest comedy duo filling the pubs in Highport.
  • After defeating the evil cleric, fighters, and assorted other rabble, the party, or what is left of them, is well rewarded. Platinum pieces show up, and we all know how good those are. Plus there will be some good arguing, haggling, etc. over who gets the sword +2 or the short sword +2.

Are you adequately prepared to laugh?