The cave seemed so beautiful
As happy as could be
Not a single hint or clue of the
Upcoming butchery

Many tasteful paintings
Were hanging on the wall
The thief was busy calculating
the value of them all

Then in the air around us
There was a fragrant smell
Little did the party know we
Were doomed to hell.

He’s a tiger
A tiger
A tiger in an Ascot

A tiger
A tiger
But he’s nobody’s mascot

He’s a tiger
A tiger
A tiger in an Ascot

A tiger
A tiger
Hope the paladin gives him gut rot

Ranger was the first to go
Magic missile in his eye
Cleric drew her plus two mace
Not at all afraid to die

Swung the weapon at him
But she only rolled a five
That miss ended any chance
Of getting out alive

He’s a tiger
A tiger
A tiger in an Ascot

A tiger
A tiger
But he’s nobody’s mascot

He’s a tiger
A tiger
A tiger in an Ascot

A tiger
A tiger
Hope the paladin gives him gut rot

Thief stabs the assassin
Assassin stabs the thief
Two more foolish victims
of his telepathic feats

Fighter tries to save us
With his crossbow of speed
Shot the paladin several times
Another illusionary deed

He’s a tiger
A tiger
A tiger in an Ascot

A tiger
A tiger
But he’s nobody’s mascot

He’s a tiger
A tiger
A tiger in an Ascot

A tiger
A tiger
Hope the paladin gives him gut rot