Perverse Osmosis The Princess and the Party - Perverse Osmosis

The Princess and the Party

PrincessLyllywen couldn’t remember much of anything that happened after her encounter with the basilisk. She remembered seeing the loathsome beast, remembered its terrible breath, and little else. She knew her name, knew that she had a sister somewhere in the cave complex, knew that her father was someone important, but as to what she was doing in this cavern dressed in chain mail and armed with a crossbow, she had no idea.

She did know that a fair amount of time had passed since her encounter with the basilisk; she could tell that by the length of her hair and the dirtiness of her fingernails. She also knew that she was fairly deadly with the crossbow, and that at least two kobolds could vouch for her skill if a cleric castspeak with the deadon them. But how she got the chain armor or the crossbow for that matter was all a blank. Lyllywen sat down on the rock that functioned as her chair and waited. What she was waiting for was another mystery. But still she waited.

Her silent waiting was broken by the sounds of footsteps. Cautiously, the princess slipped behind the rock, cocked her crossbow, and sneaked a look. She saw an armored dwarf and a human carrying a shield and sword enter the cave. The dwarf waved his hand, and more party members came into the cave. The princess took one more deep breath and stood up, holding the crossbow at the ready. Her sudden appearance drew the attention of the fighters, and she could see a half-elf starting an incantation. The princess took one hand off the crossbow and raised it as a sign of greeting.

“Adventurers,” she started, “we are well met. What quest brings you into this dank underdark?”

Dorengar was immediately suspicious of the fair form that rose before him. There had already been too many illusions, glamours, deceptions, and tricks for his liking, and the suspicion showed in his voice: “How do you know we are on a quest?”

“What else would bring you? Certainly not the accommodations or the view. By simple process of deduction, I know you quest for something.”

The paladin stepped in front of the resolute but occasionally uncouth dwarf. “Please, fair maiden. We do not wish to appear uncivilized, but our adventure to this point has been a difficult one. We have been attacked, trapped, mimicked, and deceived. If we are less than forthright with our answers, it is from necessity, not boorishness.”

The princess looked over the group, licked her suddenly dry lips, and spoke again. “I will make a guess then. You seek the same thing I do: my sister. We were playing together when the basilisk struck. My sister was carried away, and I left for dead. Thanks be to Photus that I survived. I remember little of what happened to me. But you must trust me when I tell you our quests are identical: finding my sister. You have one chance and that is following me. I think I know the way to the basilisk’s lair.”

It was Drogan’s turn to be suspicious. The half-orc distinctly remembered the Baron saying that both daughters had been kidnapped. He said nothing about one of them being left for dead. This had all the makings of another set up. He stepped from behind the cleric and answered, “If you also seek your sister, what are you doing here? Why were you waiting to ambush us? Wouldn’t your time be better spent actually looking for your sister rather than sitting in this dark cave?”

“I understand your skepticism. It is difficult to trust anyone under these circumstances. To answer your question, I was not waiting for you. I was recovering from a battle; if you look about twenty paces farther down the hall, you will see two dead kobolds who tried to ambush me. The battle left me tired, and I stopped her to recuperate. Your appearance is a happy coincidence. ”

Treilor also doubted the figure in front of them. As the princess and the party exchanged words, the magic user thought quickly about what to use to determine if this woman was telling them the truth.Detect alignmentmight be a good spell, but she didn’t think the cleric or the druid had it memorized. She might be able to use one of her scrying spells, but those took a fair amount of time to cast, and if the woman was not telling the truth, Treilor’s gesticulations might be seen as an aggressive act.

The paladin spoke again: “In the spirit of Phobus, whom you pray to and I know of, you will not mind if my companions discuss this matter privately. We will not be long, but this is a decision that cannot be made in haste. If you are of good will, then the time will not matter. If you have malevolent intent, then use the time to prepare for your doom.” The paladin turned his back to the princess and walked towards the rear of the cave, the dwarf following.

The party circled up at the opening to the cave. Rodericke could see the worry and doubt on their battle-scarred faces. He raised his hand for silence. “Well, what will the party decide?”


Do you follow the potential femme fatale into Slizz’lith’s cave?

Do you ignore her help and findyour own way in?

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      The Princess and the Party

Sing Along!

Some kind of mass illusion
some kind of wicked trick
the princess now stands before us
and licks her cherry lips, and licks her cherry lips

Taut young supple body
crossbow in her arms
she says we're seeking her sister
and it's all gone horribly wrong, it's all gone horribly wrong


Hair in the torchlight glimmers
blue eyes seem to mesmerize
the party fears a glamour
but doesn't know what to decide -- what will the party decide?

'Cause if the king really has two daughters
and this one's as tough as nails
then maybe the party should follow her
and then the basilisk will fail, then the basilisk will fail


There's danger all around us
We must set my sister free
This party's got just one chance left
Don't you want to come with me?

Don't you want to come with me?
You know you should come with me?
You probably ought to come with me.
Don't you want to come with me?