Perverse Osmosis

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More goofy thermometers

May 1st, 2015

During the same research where I found the material on the lady parts thermometer, I came across this handy gauge for determining when a person should drink what. Drinking whiskey in the morning equals murder: learn it, live it, love it.

Female Thermometers

May 1st, 2015

In doing research on the uncanny, I found this parody of the thermometer in a 1754 English newspaper.


Click here for a much bigger version of the image.

“Abandoned impudence” needs to be a name of either a burlesque act or a site that catalogs decaying houses of ill repute.

Cave Girl Maps

April 29th, 2015

My prime material plane version was in Providence, RI to do research for an upcoming conference on Weird Tales. After spending time at the always-incredible John Hay library, I went over to Cellar Stories, which is a fantasy, sci-fi, and horror lovers dream bookstore.

One of my purchases was a version of E.R. Burroughs Cave Girl (1913). Take a look at the cover and the back, and it should be apparent why I bought it.

As always, click to embiggen.

Alas, Sam Simon

March 10th, 2015

People die: I get it. Almost no adventurer gets to turn into a demi-lich or lich, spreading their specific version of neutral evil happiness around the multi-verse for as long as they want. That being written, it is a kick in the lower region to see that not long after Leonard Nimoy headed in search of space that Sam Simon, one of the guiding forces behind The Simpsons, died on the 8th.

Not only did Simon help create The Simpsons, he is credited with coming up with Mr. Burns, who is the closest thing to a lich that we are ever going to see on television. He was also a vegan and gave much of his fortune away to animal-rights causes. And he married a Playboy Playmate. And wrote for Barney Miller, Taxi, and Cheers; here’s hoping that he helped write some Dietrich material.

Sorry about the ads for Hulu, but, you know, capitalism.


Lived Long and Prospered

March 1st, 2015

As anyone with an intertube connection probably knows, Leonard Nimoy took his final voyage from the prime material plane on Feb 27. I can’t speak for all members of Perverse Osmosis, but I certainly loved Spock, and frankly, also loved In Search Of, which was the alternative history of its time. Before the History Channel spewed out Ancient Aliens or National Geographic broke the story on pyramid power, In Search Of was filling my ten-year old brain with all kinds of semi-factual events and maybe, possible happenings. In Search Of came on Saturday afternoons, and I would do my best to have all my rural chores done before the opening credits that made sure I knew that the show was based in part on theory and conjecture. Thankfully, I was and remain heavily involved in theory and conjecture.

And Spock, there isn’t much more to say. I wasn’t the most well-adjusted young person and there weren’t many role models for nerds in the early 1980s. There was Dietrich from Barney Miller, Spock, and . . .that was about it. As such, lots and lots of time was spent watching Trek reruns and thinking about how freaking rad Spock was; he probably scored super well on standardized tests and never once slow danced. Sure, he never made out with a green space babe, but Kirk probably couldn’t program in BASIC or know when to use reductio ad absurdum in arguments.

Plus, “Momma said Spock you out” is one of my favorite throwaway lines from Futurama.