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Head-Smashing Mania

December 16th, 2017

Continuing with our streak of recently unearthed middle-period Hyborian finds, Perverse Osmosis proudly presents these two woodcuts. The first one, found by archeologists in modern-day northern France, is a stylized version of Conan wielding an impromptu hammer. Scholars are debating if the painting should be read allegorically, in that it depicts the Kingdom of Aquilonia smashing one of its many enemies.

Another image from the same trove is one of King Kull biting the arm of an undead enemy. Much like the hammer blow mentioned above, there is debate over if the image is a realistic representation or allegory. Likely held by a minor Poitain noble, the image is in surprisingly good condition.

Two New Places

December 9th, 2017

Exciting news for Hyborian Age scholars: two new Hyrkanian city-states/provinces have been discovered. The city-state of Dimmorz went to war with Balkhana during the early-middle period of Conan’s life. Recently retrieved artifacts picture Conan leading a mercenary army in the pay of Balkhana’s nobles. From what can be reconstructed, Conan’s army was trapped in a walled city, but thanks to some social justice activism, the Balkhanas defeated the army from Dimmorz.

Two images survive:

An etching displaying Conan’s activism work.

A close-up of one of Conan’s biggest supporters.

Armed and Dog-erness

November 29th, 2017

One of the few radius and ulna depictions from middle-period Hyborian paintings. Additionally, it is one of the only hand-flying paintings that incorporates the radius and ulna in it.

This beautiful work was found in the collection of Baron von Grilfre, a long-time Hyborian art aficionado. Cataloged as HB124 by Lloyds of London, it is better known to alternate historians as Gnarls in Charge.

That Wonderful A Bomb Beat

November 20th, 2017

I have spent an inordinate amount of time the last five years listening to, where one of the options is 50/60s monster and halloween rock. I listened to it a year straight in 2012-2013, which says something about both me and the station.

Anywhoo, as a fan of sonic archeology, it has been a British Museum, including little numbers like “A Bomb Bop” by Mike Fern and the Del Royals.

One of the few good things to come out of Morgan City, LA.


November 19th, 2017

Malcolm Young, rocking rocker from AC/DC, finally banged his head out of the prime material plane. As they said, “It’s a long way to the top if you want to rock and roll,” and one thing that I will always give AC/DC is that they never changed their sound. Sometimes it was more produced, but it never wandered too far from high-voltage rock and roll. When you can play the same beat for more than forty years, and survive songs like “Mistress for Christmas,” you are doing something. Even Slayer went Nu-metal for that one album.

The other thing I always liked about AC/DC: Richard Ramirez stole is nickname from them, and there aren’t many bands that can say that.